"Normal"

But you are a chosen people...a people belonging to God
1 Peter 2:9

For years I prayed that the Lord would make me normal. Today that prayer makes me giggle. I wonder if the Lord chuckled too.
Have you ever met anyone "normal"? (Besides yourself, of course.) Most of us like to think we're sane regardless of how frayed our threads might be. We all long to be exceptional yet fear that even on tiptoes we wouldn't measure up to "normal".
C.S. Lewis quipped, "If God had answered all the silly prayers I've made in my life, where should I be now?" I too have prayed a lot of immature prayers, and I thank the Lord he didn't oblige me. I remember when I was housebound with agoraphobia, I told God that if he could just make me normal enough to get to the grocery store and home again, that would be enough. Imagine, I could still be in Piggly Wiggly's searching for sea salt and would have missed the privilege and joy of becoming a seasoning in the world.
In my emotionally wrought twenties, I prayed that God would change my husband's heart, and he did, but not in the way I anticipated. I thought God would convict Les of some of his insensitive ways so he would treat me with greater understanding. Instead the Lord began to work on me! And then an even funnier thing happened. Because Les's behavior was often in response to my poor attitudes, when I changed, he changed as well.
The Lord hears our silly prayers, our self-absorbed prattling, and our disjointed ruminations. Then he answers us in merciful ways.

Thankyou, Lord, for hearing past my words and giving me what
I really need. Amen

Patsy Clairmont
The Women of Faith Daily Devotional

I really enjoyed reading this devotion. With my depression, one of the main prayers I prayed was to be "normal". For me normal was to be free of depression and anxiety. Even for my physical health, having epilepsy was not "normal". Now at the other end of a particularly bad episode of depression, I realise that I'm as "normal" as the next person. What makes me special is I can relate to others who go through similar stuff. I no longer try to be someone I'm not. It takes too much energy and too much time. If I go through life that way, I wouldn't be able to bless people with the person that God made me to be. In saying that, I'm so thankful to God for carrying me through each trial and tribulation. I'm nothing without him. I hope this devotion helps others that go through the same struggle of trying to work out how to be "normal".

Hope

I've started a devotional book that my friend sent me last christmas. I haven't read it before till I'd finished another one.
The first entry for the month of January is about Hope. I'd like to share it with you as I feel that it is appropriate for the beginning of a new year.

May integrity and uprightness protect me, because my hope is in you.
-Psalm 25:21

Hope is a beautiful thing. Like a flower that thrives on sunlight and water, hope relies on the daily sustenance of the Word of God, of prayer, and of experience shared with others who have received the gift. Hope is an elusive bird to those who have no relationship with God or reservation in eternity. Hope requires more than sim;ly clicking red shoes or crossing our fingers. It is a sweet and magnificent benefit of walking with Christ. Hope looks at all that is true about the present, lifts the circumstances of life into the tender, loving hands of God - and exhales in trust. Hope makes it possible to live with our feet firmly planted on earth while our hearts and minds are committed to a vision of life that is far bigger than we are.
A new year is like the fresh, crisp page of an untouched journal. We lift our pen to the first day. This year will hold unexpected joys and sorrows, moments of faith and fear, wishes fulfilled and dreams abandoned. there is much wse do not know. But there is much we do know with absolute assurance. We know that God is in control and that his heart is good and merciful toward us. We know that we are not alone. We know that everything that happens in our lives and in the lives of those we love has already passed through our Father's hands. And we know that we are loved.

Sheila Walsh

I can very much relate about starting a fresh page in my journal. My writing seems to be neater, and the words flow smoothly onto the page. I like to look at every new day a new hope in the Lord guiding my steps. Very reassuring on a tough day.

Reflection

I have the pleasure of owning several books called " The Friendship Book" by Francis Gay. I am presently reading the 1995 edition. Its a book with a daily thought, tale, bible verse. I mark the ones that touch me and want to journal. Here's several that have stuck with me so far.

Monday - January 2
... Our life is a book of chapters three,
The past, the present, and the yet to be.
The past is gone, it is stowed away,
The present we live with every day.
The future is not for us to see,
It is locked away and God holds the key.

Wednesday - January 4
...Trust the past to the mercy of God,
The present to His love,
And the future to His providence.

One that hit me in regards to others at this time of year who have lost loved ones or are lonely...

Thursday - January 12

SNOWDROPS

The snowdrops bloom - and yet I know,

that born of wind and rain,

These flowers - so like the driven snow-

Are part of joy and pain.

For joy and pain have each a part,

Within our lives to play,

And smiles and tears come to the heart,

Most every passing day.

And, if perchance the pain should be

Almost too much to bear,

May some sad heart, within my life,

Find Snowdrops growing there.

Margaret Dixon.

One more entry that has struck me as a beautiful tradition...

Wednesday - January 18

During the annual week for Christian Unity in January, our local churches get together for a Christingle service. Everyone, youn and old, carries an orange with a candle inserted in it symbolising Jesus Christ The Light of the world, while round the orange is a decoration of sweets and nuts representing the fruits of the earth. With our lighted candles we form an unbroken circle inside the church.

At the beginning of the service we receive a Peace Candle as a gift from another Chruch. The story behind it is that in 1986 a party of Christians from America visited the Soviet Union. On their departure an old lady from the Russian Orthodox Church gave the minister three roubles, and asked him to buy a candle and take it back to his church in Pennsylvania as a gesture of goodwill.

The idea spread amongst other churches in the USA, and somehow or other a candle arrived in the UK at a church in Sutton Coldfield. From there the practice of giving candles spread between churches here.

So one more Peace Candle was lit, the symbol of our hope for the peace and unity of the whole world, for as it was said, there is not so much darkness that one small candle cannot overcome it: "I shall light a candle of understanding in thine heart, which shall not be put out."

Esdras II: The Apocrypha.

Just some of the entries. Oh I forgot to say that I don't do the daily reading, I just read entries here and there.

two sleeps to go.

Family traditions... most families have them. We as a family have made our own traditions and am adding to them each year. One of ours is that we put our tree up on the 1st Dec. Another one that we are just starting this year is that we are going to open our gifts with our three girls on Christmas eve. In years past we have attended church in the morning, gone home and done gifts then either had family over or gone out to family for lunch. Its all rushed and we always get antsy with each other, mainly Terry & I. One year when we just had Em & SJ, the girls ended up crying and not wanting to open any more presents!! Unheard of usually eh! Well we are hoping this year we will have a more relaxed season.
After all we should have our focus on Jesus and his miraculous birth, as we say 'Jesus is the reason for the season.'
I pray you all have a merry Christmas and a happy and safe holiday.

Christmas Peace???

I am sitting here at 9pm with only half my brain working. For the last couple of weeks I have not slept well at all. Mostly because of the continuous merry go round of my thoughts and making mental lists that I know I'll forget by morning!!
So last night I had pen and paper next to the bed and as a thought came up I wrote it down. I had to turn on the lamp a few times, which by the loud sighs from Terry I gather that that was annoying him, so I went in to the loo to write down further thoughts. And then I took a half sleep pill and went to sleep! Yay!!!
Well I will carry on that lovely task of organising christmas 'stuff'.

Blessings to all

Sleep!

Its very late and I've been busy all day. Yet I don't feel ready to settle down. Unfortunately I know I am tired. I haven't been sleeping well lately. I think the stress of moving. I long for a really good uninterrupted sleep. I know for a fact that I am not the only mother who suffers this way. How do we keep going? I heard once that they use sleep deprivation as a torture method. It would never work on a mother, but a man. Yeah, I can see how that would be a torture for them.
My pal Jo is in Auckland for the U2 concert. I would say that she is feeling quite on a high at the moment and won't be able to sleep for awhile. Hope Beks is happy enough to let you sleep in Jo.
The Spiritual Journalling course I am attending was quite challenging on Thurs. Trying to work out our lifes 'hinges'. The time period where there is an event, person, or other influence that changes the path you are on. One hinge of mine was when we moved back to NZ after living in Australia for 6yrs. I was nearly 11yrs when we returned. I remember feeling very awkward at that age. With the onset of puberty, it was a very confusing time. I was no longer a child but not a woman either. I had to change my life path and embrace the next phase of my life. I didn't adapt to that change well and found myself struggling to be 'acceptable' to my peers. Even when attending High School I wasn't accepted. I was too different. Too nice almost. Being from a christian home and trying to fit in at school and be 'cool' wasn't a good combination.
Its very interesting but also scary to look back at my life and really look into why I chose the path I went down. But that's another story. I'd better settle down now seen as though its 12:30am.
Goodnight to all. I think I shall sleep now.

The House

We have shifted!!!
Goodbye our dear home,
The home we loved.

White wood, high roof
Old and quaint
Character

The space we will miss,
The roses too.
And dear sweet Maggie,
Under a tree.

We loved that house,
Our first house.
Goodbye to you, goodbye.